The fabric of our lives...

...and no, I am not talking about cotton. I am talking of friends. I was always a loner - still am - but I went through a serious phase (starting even as a kid) of believing that I could survive without attachment to friends that really heightened in my 20's. Whether it was the rebel in me, the desire to have the utmost confidence in myself, or maybe just plain old insecurity - I pretty much shunned deep friendships. But much has happened since then. I lived abroad for years, made bad decisions in relationships, changed careers and figured out that although it's lovely to spend evenings alone and hide in a movie theatre with obligations to no one for 2 hours - life is so much richer with relationships. Especially ones that tend to be able to handle forgiveness, are made of loyalty without severe expectation or judgement and come equipped with an amazing capacity to exchange ideas and information, creativity and laughter. It wasn't my first rodeo in Paris - I had already studied and lived here before, but when I came in 1986, I was enrolled in school for clothing design at ESMOD. I met Elsa: she was short, had dyed black hair that was spiked up with pommade as her head was shaved on the side and a "meche" - one of those tiny braids longer than all of her other hair. She wore mens' jackets and trousers - and we listened to the same music. It was Goth for us - the Bat Cave had launched earlier in the decade in London: Bauhaus, Siouxsie, Nick Cave, Sisters. We would stay out all night at the Boucanier, falling asleep on the couches to the side of the dance floor until the first metro would open at dawn and then our merry band would disperse and make our ways to our respective homes, as the boulangers were already at work baking the first croissants of the morning. There were a group of us that only got stronger after we graduated: Laurent worked for French TV and spent all of his money on vinyl and clothes by Yamamoto. Sandra was busy booking our collections on Parisian TV shows and getting as gigs to show our clothes around France. Armelle lived near Versailles and would have us over to her parents' apartment for holidays when they were out of town. And Manu would smoke cigarettes and fall in love with a different girl every week. We would go to afternoon Tea Dances and party next to JP Gaultier. BOY of London and their followers were huge. We sold our collections in a Galerie for Jeunes Createurs aux Halles. In those days Les Halles was more friendly...still seedy, still sex shops, even our landlady of the gallery was a Madame with rooms upstairs, but the Costes brother had opened their cafe. Laura Todd had introduced a chocolate chip cookie shop and we would meet every day to discuss fashion "Au Pere Tranquille" when we weren't at home in our ateliers, on the road or working selling our designs at the Galerie. When I moved back to the States in the nineties, I would return to Paris at least yearly, often for business or just visits (and now for teaching) but also for special occasions: a long weekend for the wedding of Elsa & Laurent (he wore Thierry Mugler!) and we partied til 5am, the birth of Evaluna so I could present her with her first shoes by Baby Dior and a little hand-sewn black dress and bloomers, Elsa's surprise party for her 40th birthday at Alcazar with drag queens and cigarette girls, my 40th birthday in Oberkampf with a huge cake shaped like an American flag...they would move apartments and arrondissements but there was always a bed for me. Their son Vermeer was born a week before the twins...and now our kids are friends. And if the Sisters of Mercy were to come on right now, we would all get out on the dance floor, wearing black, with our heads down, not speaking and dance: First and last and always...

Evaluna (13), Elsa, Laurent, and Vermeer (6 1/2)...my favorite French family

Il pleut, il pleut à verse.

When it rains it pours. Man, I need my Lexapro. Zelda shattered the glass door of the shower...it wasn't a good system anyway (do you hear the justification in my voice?). 2 broken goblets: those we can replace at IKEA - say it: EE-KAY-AH. But an entire shower door, BHV here I come! Thank the gods that Manu (one of my dear French bachelor friends of 25 years) was here for dinner...I felt myself cracking this weekend and invited him for pizza with the dynamic duo (Creed and Zelda - of course!) Creed insisted on wearing his full Mariachi suit out into the streets of the Marais to pick up our delightfully "couture" pizza. Creed had another migraine this morning; it lasted 1 1/2 hours, complete with vomiting and photophobia. I spoke with a lovely pediatrician and am trying to regulate his food intake, hydration and sleep. Why would almost 7 year olds want to sleep when it's light out until 11pm? Ah...summer in Paris. I remember living here and going to the movies, to an evening show and coming out of the theatre and having it still be daytime - in the nighttime. And then after a walk along the Seine we would go to see the midnight show of "Faster Pussycat, Kill, Kill" that showed without question every night at 24h. So, who can explain nighttime that looks like daytime to a kid that wants to invite everyone over for a party? Sometimes Creed will ask: "Mom, is it breakfast time or lunch?" As for Zelda, she is having a full body experience...she is experiencing Paris with all of her weight of 40 lbs. She needs to push against everything, everyone and feel the pressure, feel things move, feel her power...she has become quite good at saying "Pardon" as she takes off ("Mom, let me do it!") on her own, down the streets of our neighborhood. But alas, not everyone or thing likes to be pushed against : old French women, kids on the playground, shower doors... But today was my last day of "freedom" before I start teaching tomorrow. Malou - our nounou - came and took the kids to the parc. I worked on my syllabus, went and made photocopies, took the métro to Barbès to peruse the fabric stores of remnants - and yes, bought a few metres (oh, there is one color I will present in the fall besides black!) and then, met another old friend of 25 years. The sunset was lovely from the terrasse and as Creed fell asleep to the Elvis special on TV, he remarked, "Why does this guy's voice sound like the Dad on Dinosaur Train?" (For those of you NOT in the know, it's a kids' cartoon on PBS). As for la petite Zelda, headphones on, she was "Rolling in the Deep" with Adele, in an instant...Bonne nuit de Paris...

Migraines, a hematoma, rain, kids - all in the Marais...

I feel as though I'll ramble so here goes. But first: we are in Paris, we are in Paris, we are in Paris...I feel like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz. Yes, la vie est belle but this week anywhere would have tried the last nerves of anyone. I am beginning to realize that Creed gets migraines. I really don't believe that it has anything to do with his VP shunts or shunt malfunction or even his vision. Ever since he could express pain in a fairly directed way, he has been able to tell me about his headaches. They don't come often but when they do, he wakes up writhing and crying in pain...no loud noise - not even cartoons for distraction. He wants darkness and then there's the vomiting. It happened after the night of July 4th: too little sleep, too many bonbons, rain & sun, Coca cola...who knows but I am trying to track it all. And then suddenly he'll vomit one last time - after about 3 hours - he'll declare that he's better. Was it yesterday that I slipped coming in from our lovely terrasse as I pulled in the laundry when it started to rain? Yes and as I cursed in two languages, my shin bled and developed a huge swollen hematoma that put me in bed with ice for the afternoon. The twins are angels and devils in disguise. They do wonderfully for several hours and then sink into whining, demanding, complaining little turds. I couldn't leave the appart for arnica or painkillers because that would have meant readying the kids and going down 5 flights. Creed is doing well with his French but I still don't trust an almost 7 yr old to go down into the streets of Paris to the pharmacie - even if we can see it from the terrasse. The rain comes and goes in buckets. The weather today was in the 60's. The kids at the park were a friendly lot and latched on to the twins, despite Zelda being quite disagreeable. After the initial meeting of a blind child and their reaction of "Oh, la pauvre!" (oh, the poor thing), I had them close their eyes and they each tried walking with her long white cane. They asked lots of questions and when I asked them if they lived in the "quartier", they said "Oui, le Marais." Yes, they live in the Marais...is that cool I asked them? "Ah oui", they shrugged, "0n a l'habitude." - "We're used to it"... So, we are in Paris, we are in Paris, we are in Paris...I think I am getting sick, freezing under the blankets, looking out over the rooftops...

Haute Couture at age 6 1/2...

...the twins slept this morning until the phone rang with a call from from Christian. "Rendez-vous au Palais Royal a 10h." So, finally we were up and out before noon and on our way to see "On aura tout vu" and their Haute Couture show under the shade trees of the Palais. Christian wrangled us seats in the front row, Zelda made friends with the DJ and got the show's mix of music and we enjoyed every minute of the short production. Women with elaborate headresses, men dressed as centaurs, and even a dog on the runway. Creed's swag included a black and silver fan by Caron who sponsored the show. We made a run for the Jean Paul Gaultier show but were too late. BUT, the icing on the cake came this evening when I met our next door neighbours: Matt, is a photographer from Toronto, his lovely friend is Andej Pejic - the infamous, stunning and captivating boy/girl model who walked for Gaultier today and Tracy who designs eyewear for Linda Farrow. They loved Creed and Zelda and vice versa. We were busy hosting our tribe on our terrasse for the 4th of July - hamburgers, Freedom fries, cupcakes topped with American flags and plenty of French wine...our fete followed a day of couture, buying a new phone card, replacing Zelda's sunglasses and Creed's hats that were stolen by braving the sales "Les Soldes" at H & M, the kids au Parc Villeman, and lovely afternoon cocktails at the cafe Beaubourg. What ever will I do when work begins?

Creed waiting patiently for the defile to begin...

First out on the runway...

I am loving red...

Boy Centaur...

Butts???

Creed au Palais Royal...

Zelda doing a Marilyn Monroe above a grate...

Us...love...

Oh, la vie...2 days in...

I don't know why it has been more difficult for the twins to get through their jet lag this summer. Perhaps because they are more aware, more excited, they have more expectations? They remember friends. places and things to do? Phew...it's been exhausting. I finally resorted to Melotonin tonight - an old trick that we used on Zelda as a blind toddler getting used to her interior clock. They finally fell asleep before midnight. Christian and Manu were here for dinner this evening on our lovely terrasse. We have an apartment on the 5th floor in the Marais. Across the street, we play "Rear Window" aka "Fenetre sur Cour" - watching our French neighbours in a Hitchcockian sort of way as they leave their windows and shutters open until the sun goes down at 10pm or so. There's a woman with an amazing library across the way - she seems like an editor - always at her computer. There's a gentleman in a lovely "maison" - duplex in the city - with potted plants and always a guest for dinner on the balcony. Two full days have passed and the twins are adjusting - Creed remembers everything: every word, almost every nuance in French and when he doesn't, with frustration in his voice he says: "Maman, I don't understand you!" He has a sleepover this Friday with his "ami", Vermeer, the son of my dear friends: Elsa and Laurent. Elsa and I were in clothing design school together so many moons ago and have known each other for over 25 years. I spent the afternoon today with Laurent who I have known just as long - even before they were married. We have a tradition of doing the newest boutiques and streets in Paris where things are happening. Sooo...la vie. The twins have been sleeping in...tomorrow morning I will wake them and try to crash a Haute Couture show at the Palais Royal. Who could refuse them? More on that later. This morning we took the metro for the first time since last summer and Zelda went nuts. She loves it and hates it - at the same time. The love comes from the adventure, the sound, the movement. The hate...well, where's the train??? She is impatient and doesn't like unexpected transition. Thus, while waiting for the metro on the quai of the station Republique, she swung her cane and hit a woman in the eye. Oh yes, Zelda - making friends with the French. At least the woman was wearing glasses and was sitting quietly as she meekly scowled and smiled and accepted my apologies as Zelda refused to say "Excusez-moi, Madame...je suis desolee." So, then ... Zelda wasn't exactly through with her reign of terror...we went to Joue Club as I had unwittingly promised them the night before: Go to sleep and we'll go to Joue Club, Ha! Creed chose his Legos and Zelda played with keychains until the time came to leave the small boutique into the grand gallerie where the shops were gathered. Zelda ultimately threw a fit - the metro? Yes? No! Legos? No! Yes! As she listened to the echos in the gallerie, she again swung her cane and WHACK! into the knee of the security guard of Joue Club. "Oh la, ca fait mal!" - Yes, sir: it really does hurt! AND again, I apologized and dragged her off to the metro. Once underground and happy as a ... who knows what...we took two trains home to our station, arrived at the appart and waited for our beloved nounou, Malou, to arrive so I could escape into the anonymous streets, friends, cafes and rendezvous of this fair city that I adore.

Connards!

So, our Air France flight was lovely...it really was. That is until we arrived in Paris, got set up in our wonderful apartment and started to unpack. And then I began discovering that things were missing. We checked 4 bags this year and I shipped 2 boxes ahead as we are here in Paris for 2 months and I didn't want to have to buy everything here. As I unpacked the 2 larger bags, nothing looked disturbed, until I realized items were missing and I started to panic. First, where was my favorite Dries Van Noten bag that I have carried for years? I had laid it across my clothes and it was gone. My Rick Owens shoes - gorgeous stilettos - that I didn't pack with my other shoes in another valise. Gone. A ziplock bag of shampoo, body cream, toothpaste and brushes - gone. Another bag housed an unlocked cellphone lent to me by a friend - gone. Many other various pieces - a plastic box of Zelda's sunglasses - literally worth $15 - they took them! Creed had packed 3 of his favorite hats - they took those, too. But perhaps the biggest slap in the face was the meds...last summer in Paris, we ran out of meds and eventually Zelda had a seizure here. This year we contacted the doctors, the pharmacies, and the insurance company - we ordered double doses of Zelda's seizure meds as well as my Lexapro (a still necessary evil that I continue to take after cancer treatment & surgeries). We thought we were all set. But no....I packed the extra bottles in our checked luggage and thankfully took about a month's worth on board with me. Evan just informed me today that the insurance company and pharmacy will replace our meds for free...so much for Air France, they just asked me to fill out forms, and more forms and more phone calls. I fully expect to see my Rick Owens shoes on e-bay. And "Eh, connards! I will bid on them!!"

dodo en Premier Voyageur on Air France...

En route...enfin...

En route ... enfin... A hellacious delay at Austin/Bergstrom makes me hate Delta even more than ever but I stop to remind myself how thankful I am for this trip. We were delayed, on the tarmac and both Creed & Zelda had to pee at least 6 times - per child - and listen to Green Day, a lot. Finally in Atlanta, the amazing flight attendants put us on the big electric cart and whisked us off to our Air France gate. Phew...now Zelda knows everyone in the airport and on the plane  and everyone else thinks Creed is on his World Tour - complete with costumed get-up (his choice), his electric guitar on his back and his Scoobie Doo rolling suitcase. Finally - in Premier Voyageur - and having a glass of champagne ( after 6 more trips - each - to the potty.) Creed is entranced by Lucky Luke, en français bien sûr and Zelda is singing above her headphones to Delta Rae. "Canard fumé" arrives any moment - it is dinner on Air France, afterall. A bit of Melatonin and then "dodo"...that's sleepy time. Fingers crossed...