Oh, la vie...2 days in...

I don't know why it has been more difficult for the twins to get through their jet lag this summer. Perhaps because they are more aware, more excited, they have more expectations? They remember friends. places and things to do? Phew...it's been exhausting. I finally resorted to Melotonin tonight - an old trick that we used on Zelda as a blind toddler getting used to her interior clock. They finally fell asleep before midnight. Christian and Manu were here for dinner this evening on our lovely terrasse. We have an apartment on the 5th floor in the Marais. Across the street, we play "Rear Window" aka "Fenetre sur Cour" - watching our French neighbours in a Hitchcockian sort of way as they leave their windows and shutters open until the sun goes down at 10pm or so. There's a woman with an amazing library across the way - she seems like an editor - always at her computer. There's a gentleman in a lovely "maison" - duplex in the city - with potted plants and always a guest for dinner on the balcony. Two full days have passed and the twins are adjusting - Creed remembers everything: every word, almost every nuance in French and when he doesn't, with frustration in his voice he says: "Maman, I don't understand you!" He has a sleepover this Friday with his "ami", Vermeer, the son of my dear friends: Elsa and Laurent. Elsa and I were in clothing design school together so many moons ago and have known each other for over 25 years. I spent the afternoon today with Laurent who I have known just as long - even before they were married. We have a tradition of doing the newest boutiques and streets in Paris where things are happening. Sooo...la vie. The twins have been sleeping in...tomorrow morning I will wake them and try to crash a Haute Couture show at the Palais Royal. Who could refuse them? More on that later. This morning we took the metro for the first time since last summer and Zelda went nuts. She loves it and hates it - at the same time. The love comes from the adventure, the sound, the movement. The hate...well, where's the train??? She is impatient and doesn't like unexpected transition. Thus, while waiting for the metro on the quai of the station Republique, she swung her cane and hit a woman in the eye. Oh yes, Zelda - making friends with the French. At least the woman was wearing glasses and was sitting quietly as she meekly scowled and smiled and accepted my apologies as Zelda refused to say "Excusez-moi, Madame...je suis desolee." So, then ... Zelda wasn't exactly through with her reign of terror...we went to Joue Club as I had unwittingly promised them the night before: Go to sleep and we'll go to Joue Club, Ha! Creed chose his Legos and Zelda played with keychains until the time came to leave the small boutique into the grand gallerie where the shops were gathered. Zelda ultimately threw a fit - the metro? Yes? No! Legos? No! Yes! As she listened to the echos in the gallerie, she again swung her cane and WHACK! into the knee of the security guard of Joue Club. "Oh la, ca fait mal!" - Yes, sir: it really does hurt! AND again, I apologized and dragged her off to the metro. Once underground and happy as a ... who knows what...we took two trains home to our station, arrived at the appart and waited for our beloved nounou, Malou, to arrive so I could escape into the anonymous streets, friends, cafes and rendezvous of this fair city that I adore.

Connards!

So, our Air France flight was lovely...it really was. That is until we arrived in Paris, got set up in our wonderful apartment and started to unpack. And then I began discovering that things were missing. We checked 4 bags this year and I shipped 2 boxes ahead as we are here in Paris for 2 months and I didn't want to have to buy everything here. As I unpacked the 2 larger bags, nothing looked disturbed, until I realized items were missing and I started to panic. First, where was my favorite Dries Van Noten bag that I have carried for years? I had laid it across my clothes and it was gone. My Rick Owens shoes - gorgeous stilettos - that I didn't pack with my other shoes in another valise. Gone. A ziplock bag of shampoo, body cream, toothpaste and brushes - gone. Another bag housed an unlocked cellphone lent to me by a friend - gone. Many other various pieces - a plastic box of Zelda's sunglasses - literally worth $15 - they took them! Creed had packed 3 of his favorite hats - they took those, too. But perhaps the biggest slap in the face was the meds...last summer in Paris, we ran out of meds and eventually Zelda had a seizure here. This year we contacted the doctors, the pharmacies, and the insurance company - we ordered double doses of Zelda's seizure meds as well as my Lexapro (a still necessary evil that I continue to take after cancer treatment & surgeries). We thought we were all set. But no....I packed the extra bottles in our checked luggage and thankfully took about a month's worth on board with me. Evan just informed me today that the insurance company and pharmacy will replace our meds for free...so much for Air France, they just asked me to fill out forms, and more forms and more phone calls. I fully expect to see my Rick Owens shoes on e-bay. And "Eh, connards! I will bid on them!!"

dodo en Premier Voyageur on Air France...

En route...enfin...

En route ... enfin... A hellacious delay at Austin/Bergstrom makes me hate Delta even more than ever but I stop to remind myself how thankful I am for this trip. We were delayed, on the tarmac and both Creed & Zelda had to pee at least 6 times - per child - and listen to Green Day, a lot. Finally in Atlanta, the amazing flight attendants put us on the big electric cart and whisked us off to our Air France gate. Phew...now Zelda knows everyone in the airport and on the plane  and everyone else thinks Creed is on his World Tour - complete with costumed get-up (his choice), his electric guitar on his back and his Scoobie Doo rolling suitcase. Finally - in Premier Voyageur - and having a glass of champagne ( after 6 more trips - each - to the potty.) Creed is entranced by Lucky Luke, en français bien sûr and Zelda is singing above her headphones to Delta Rae. "Canard fumé" arrives any moment - it is dinner on Air France, afterall. A bit of Melatonin and then "dodo"...that's sleepy time. Fingers crossed...

Angels at Target...

So, on Father's Day - aside from serving breakfast in bed to Evan - he and Creed took off to Lockhart for a boy's afternoon of barbecue, neon and old signs while Zelda and I ran errands in town and went swimming. I told Zelda that we needed to go to Target - and she agreed: "Yes, Mom, I need to go to Target." "Zelda, why do want to go there?" "Because Mom, the Angels live at Target and I want to see them." Ok, then... As she busied herself, pushing the cart through the aisles, I asked her, "So, Zelda, have you seen the Angels yet?" "Yes, Mom. I did already." "And what did the Angels say?" "Mom, they didn't say anything they just made sounds." "Like what, Z? "Like shhhhh...." Pure magic.

My kids are still cool...but I am lazy...

The first day of Kindergarten was a breeze compared to the last day. So many emotions, so much growth, so many stories, so much change...and here we are at the end of the school year - readying to spend another summer in Paris. I guess that I can only highlight the change and growth that happened within our family with these amazing twins: Creed: had the most wonderful teacher - Mr L. After 3 years of female teachers in French preschool, he was now in a classroom of 21 boys and girls with Mr L. Creed responded like a champ despite some learning difficulties. As yet undiagnosed, he is full of energy, creativity and imagination yet has trouble with retention, symbol recognition, and handwriting. He had a great tutor this spring and advanced by leaps and bounds but we have a long way to go in 1st grade. Creed-isms and pertinent questions: "Mom, do you love yourself?" "Why, yes Creed. I do. Do you love you love yourself?" "Yes, I think I'm pretty great." When his Kindergarten teacher was murdered this past New Year's he told his class: "I know we are all sad but let's think about all of the good times." Creed and Zelda both loved Miss Esme very much. When I told Creed that he would be spending a week at a day camp with a bunch of boys, he asked: "Mom, is this a sports camp? Because I am not really a sports guy." Creed is wildly imaginative, writes books, makes up stories and tells tall tails. He won the Energy Award at day camp and was definitely the "cool cat" of Kindergarten. He likes to be kind and helpful and his latest endeavor is cooking: the other day he created grilled cheese nachos with rosemary. Now as we ready for Paris again - in just 2 short weeks - we'll see what adventures he has in store.

My kid is cool...

...well, actually they both are cool. But every once in a while, there is an anecdote that bears repeating. Tomorrow is their 6th birthday - that is, 6 years since that fateful night when they cut my kids out of my stomach. It's been an amazing adventure - not easy of course, but parenthood isn't supposed to be easy. But 21 surgeries, 4 shunts, visual impairment, blindness and seizures in foreign countries all add up to some pretty thick skin but also some very good life lessons.

Creed and Zelda are now in Kindergarten. They miss their beloved Ecole of 3 years and their friends that they made there, but are adapting very well to Kindergarten. They have dedicated and attentive teachers and classrooms full of new friends. But with a birthday at the start of a new school in a new school year, it's a bit difficult to put together that list of invitees for the Birthday Extravaganza at Kiddies Acres. Of course, we'll invite their old "amis" from Ecole as we try to sift through 22 kids in each of their new classes and find out who each of the twins calls a friend in only week #2 of school.

With Zelda, it's always a bit difficult to figure out who she likes. Everyone seems to love Zelda, as they call out her name each morning and cheerfully say "Hi Zelda." She, on the other hand, seems quite indifferent to almost everyone except for the teachers.
But with Creed, we try to pull information out of him. Creed had already decided on 2 friends that he wanted to invite.
Joey is his new best buddy - they met the first day of school - and Creed mentions him everyday. So, then I asked Creed, "Who else besides Joey would you like to invite from your class?"
His answer: "Mom, I want to invite Zachy. I know that he'll need extra help but I really want him to come to my party."
Zachy is in a wheelchair. He doesn't walk or speak. He was in Zelda's PPCD class last year (Public Preschool for Children with Disabilities) so we have passed the year with smiles and knowing looks between us and his parents and his sister is in Zelda's Kindergarten. Of all of the kids, Creed wanted to invite Zachy. I love that in him. I wish every kid would feel that way for Zachy, for Zelda, for Fin, for all those kids that are loved from afar but are not always included...I wish for every kid, parent, family and otherwise to have that kind of compassion.

Happy, happy birthday to my twins - I am so glad that they are not "normal"....I love you, C & Z!

Tumblr - STOP IT!

...well, I really don't hate Tumblr but I do hate how people use it. There has been this trend around for a while of posting photos - just cool photos, things people like, no words, no reasons, no descriptions, not even photos taken by the poster. They are usually photos found on the internet that people obviously like for one reason or another and want to share for whatever reason. There are entire blogs based on this. Entire magazines. Well, it pisses me off. I guess mostly because people are not giving reasons. There is an ingrained, unspoken and assumed "stamp of approval" without words. It's actually quite egotistical. "I like this, therefore you should." "I see validity in this, don't you?" But I want a conversation - is it the color? The beauty of the sunset? The shape of the clothing? The black and white starkness? The fragile patina of eroding paint?

I like photos, too. I like lots of things expressed by others in a visual medium. But recently I have realized why I need to describe what it is about something and why I like it. Zelda makes me open my eyes, my ears and my thoughts more and more each day. It's not good enough to just take a road trip with the twins and say "Hey, look at those cows!" I describe the shape, the color, how many there are, the sound they make, and the field they are standing in. If I see a cool building or a billboard or the right red ball of the sun coming up this morning - it's too easy to say to Creed, "Wow, look at the sun." The dialogue is needed. Why is it different or interesting or beautiful? How does the color compare to something else in nature? How does it make him feel?

So, I think Tumblr lets people be lazy. People who spend time looking at other people's work...the photographer had a reason to take the photo, the photo is his or her words. They are not yours. Challenge yourself.


This morning as I drove the kids to school, I did it in an almost unconscious kind of way. Usually, Evan and I pull in Circle Drive and I get out and walk with each twin to their Kindergarten classroom while Evan waits in car. The children are used to it. Zelda knows the route to Casis and that curve into the drop-off driveway as well as she knows the hill of our street, the turn down our alley and the slant of our driveway. But this morning, Evan had an errand and I took the kids to school alone. I parked the car on a side street and then began walking them down the sidewalk, up the concrete steps and around the back of the school. Creed was thrilled. He recognized the route and could tell we were entering the school from a back door. And then I heard it: Zelda asking, "Mama, what are we doing?" Shit, I hadn't told her. It was the Tumblr photo. It was the assumption. It was a lack of words. It snapped in me - the beauty of words is just as important, strong and inviting as the beauty of the visual. Have we become more and more steeped in a lazy expression of another person's declaration of their "vision"? Does any of this make sense to anyone besides me? I would appreciate your thoughts...

P.S. Oh, and another thing I have a hard time with is blogs by people that post what they are wearing every day. It seems to be a twenty-something phenomenon. Yes, you are all "super cute" and clever stylists. Bravo. But now really kids, do we really care about how you put together your "vintage find" with last year's belt from a designer sale?
Can you tell I am in a snarky mood?